(To get the full effect of the title, you have to think about Eric Hadland, Nathaniel Strenger, Ted Warsavage and I hiking through the snowy Northwoods singing Red Hot Chili Peppers. Just think, Eric and Nathaniel, doing their hobbly thing, singing. While we're lost. In the cold. Hopefully, it will make you smile and not offend you.)
Well friends, thank you very much for praying for me, but, today, miraculous divine intervention didn't show up and I bombed the math section of the GREs :). There's an option at the end whether or not to report the score.. I decided not to register the score, since umm... I pretty much just guessed on the last 3rd of the test.
It's honestly really very humbling and frustrating, especially since I will have to take it again... in China. And the math section won't go away either. For someone who only applied to Wheaton and didn't think much of the SATs, this grad school and GRE thing is an awful hassle. In our cocky Wheaton arrogance (or maybe just mine?), not being able to complete 28 middle school level questions in 45 minutes without a calculator puts me in my place.
Anticipating these damn GREs, I was thinking yesterday about what it means to trust in God, and even about the nature of your prayers for me. (Ooo... scary questions.) What does it mean when some things we pray for work out the way we want them to, and other things don't? What does it mean when some things look like divine appointments and other times, I can't figure out what God is trying to do, for the life of me?
In the end, I'm trying the best that I can to go the direction the Lord has called me. Personally, the grad program in Berkeley and UCLA look great, according to my standards. I don't necessarily have the numbers to get into them, and whether I get in is really God's prerogative. But if I don't get in, what then? Ah, trust in the Lord. He knows my life and what is ahead far better than I do. Trust in the Lord, and don't mistake God as a divine magician who glorifies an individual. In the end, it must be God who becomes greater as I become less.
Ohh listen to us Christians. If I didn't know better, I'd think we were just playing mental games with ourselves, trying to exonerate the actions of a deity we claim is loving and good. No wonder people think we're fools. (But everyone's a fool, it's just a matter of who we're fools for. I'm pretty ok being God's fool. He's been good and faithful to me.)
Faith is a strange thing. If God played by our rules, it doesn't make sense. But He doesn't play by our rules. (Honestly, it still doesn't make sense, but that has to be ok.)
So for the sweet part, I'm off to China (via Korea) tonight :). I'm gonna keep on going, and worry about the GREs when I need to take them again.
Friends, thanks for praying the will of the Lord in my life. Trust me... I will be needing your prayer.... especially when I come across the math section again.
Let me know how I can pray for you. Really. People think I'm saying that as a gesture of formality or something. I'm serious.
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Sunday, May 27, 2007
The Devil's Music
A part of me cringed just a bit today.
The church I used to go to had a picnic, and I showed up just to say hi and bye to my friends. They had set up a speaker system next to the large gathering of those sitting in little groups munching on burgers, pasta and baked beans. It played background music...
... But the background music was CCM worship music. CCM criticisms aside, words about the glory, love, and power of God was, at that point, relegated to being background noise, nothing more than the equivalent of elevator music. Kickball, volleyball, barbecuing, bantering, all of the normal Memorial Day hubbub, was baptized and christened in CCM as opposed to classic rock or some of this weeks top 10.
Yes, some will say I am being too harsh... it's just a church social. It's just music. It's not like someone sat down, took music (supposedly) written for the explicit worship of God, and decided to desensitize it for everyone, using it as a cheap and clean substitute for the devil's rock and roll. It was unintentional, if it can even be considered an offense.
But this is why I'm sad and not angry... the fact that it was unintentional. The fact that music used to worship in one setting is used as noise filler in another, without bothering anyone, says something about the role of that music in our lives. It's not really set apart... it's just a replacement for the worldly version. In this case, I wonder what is more harmful, letting the sacred and holy become mundane, or "subjecting" ourselves to the mundane and worldly.
I had really wished they would have just turned up Classic Rock 103.7 or 99.3 The Buzz and broke out the brewskies instead. I could have at least gotten jiggy to Foreigner and Shakira.
To top it off, on my way out, a man in a wheelchair sat on the outskirts of the group, by himself, watching everyone else have a great time. Perhaps it was just that moment, and perhaps I'm wrong, but no one was talking to him and he looked a little alone. No one in that meeting of Christians, seemed to see him.
To make it worse, I saw him but continued on my way out even after making that observation.
"Jesus said, 'For judgment I have come into this world, so that the blind will see and those who see will become blind.' Some Pharisees who were with him heard him say this and asked, 'What? Are we blind too?' Jesus said, 'If you were blind, you would not be guilty of sin; but now that you claim you can see, your guilt remains.'" -John 9:39-41
The church I used to go to had a picnic, and I showed up just to say hi and bye to my friends. They had set up a speaker system next to the large gathering of those sitting in little groups munching on burgers, pasta and baked beans. It played background music...
... But the background music was CCM worship music. CCM criticisms aside, words about the glory, love, and power of God was, at that point, relegated to being background noise, nothing more than the equivalent of elevator music. Kickball, volleyball, barbecuing, bantering, all of the normal Memorial Day hubbub, was baptized and christened in CCM as opposed to classic rock or some of this weeks top 10.
Yes, some will say I am being too harsh... it's just a church social. It's just music. It's not like someone sat down, took music (supposedly) written for the explicit worship of God, and decided to desensitize it for everyone, using it as a cheap and clean substitute for the devil's rock and roll. It was unintentional, if it can even be considered an offense.
But this is why I'm sad and not angry... the fact that it was unintentional. The fact that music used to worship in one setting is used as noise filler in another, without bothering anyone, says something about the role of that music in our lives. It's not really set apart... it's just a replacement for the worldly version. In this case, I wonder what is more harmful, letting the sacred and holy become mundane, or "subjecting" ourselves to the mundane and worldly.
I had really wished they would have just turned up Classic Rock 103.7 or 99.3 The Buzz and broke out the brewskies instead. I could have at least gotten jiggy to Foreigner and Shakira.
To top it off, on my way out, a man in a wheelchair sat on the outskirts of the group, by himself, watching everyone else have a great time. Perhaps it was just that moment, and perhaps I'm wrong, but no one was talking to him and he looked a little alone. No one in that meeting of Christians, seemed to see him.
To make it worse, I saw him but continued on my way out even after making that observation.
"Jesus said, 'For judgment I have come into this world, so that the blind will see and those who see will become blind.' Some Pharisees who were with him heard him say this and asked, 'What? Are we blind too?' Jesus said, 'If you were blind, you would not be guilty of sin; but now that you claim you can see, your guilt remains.'" -John 9:39-41
By our love, by our love. Yes they'll know we are Christians...
When my buddy and I were in Everglades City, Florida, with nowhere to stay at 10:00 at night, we saw a sign of someone who gave swamp tours. He had also painted a Jesus fish next to his personal contact information. I, being the most shameless Chinese person I know, called his cell phone and told him that we were two students from a Christian college in Illinois and were wondering if he had a yard for us to pitch a tent and crash for the night. In his southern drawl, he asked, "Ya'll are Brothers right?" "Yessir we are." "Well then set up right near that sign." "Thank you very much sir."
Later that week, not having very much money to spend on food, we went to a church with pews full of people with white hair. We were the youngest there. They gushed hospitality and nearly forced us to stay for lunch afterwards (not that we resisted at all.)
"Someone told him, "Your mother and brothers are standing outside, wanting to speak to you."
I love the story of the Rich Young Man. There is so much beef and umph in those verses. I love it (yet am secretly a little afraid) when Jesus says that it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of the needle than for a rich person to enter the Kingdom, and Mark says, "The disciples were even more amazed, and said to each other, 'Who then can be saved?'" In their minds, wealth indicated God's approval and blessing. I can see them in their amazement; John nudging Peter whispering, "Wait, did he just say that?" and Peter responding, "Dude, I'm not sure..." Without missing a beat, Jesus surprises us again and says, "With man this is impossible, but not with God; all things are possible with God." Yes, even a camel through the eye of the needle, says Jesus, is possible with God's grace.
Mark ends it by saying, "'I tell you the truth,' Jesus replied, 'no one who has left home or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or fields for me and the gospel will fail to receive a hundred times as much in this present age (homes, brothers, sisters, mothers, children and fields—and with them, persecutions) and in the age to come, eternal life. But many who are first will be last, and the last first.'"
In my selfishness, I wonder what it would look like to really treat others as family, to be truly generous, not just when I have a vested interest. I listened to my brother and his "me first" worldview today, dripping off of every sentence that came out of his mouth. (Granted, it was his birthday.) In my family in which the best has always been reserved for my brother and I, I wonder if I would be hearing a different way with words if we had lived a bigger vision of family.
Later that week, not having very much money to spend on food, we went to a church with pews full of people with white hair. We were the youngest there. They gushed hospitality and nearly forced us to stay for lunch afterwards (not that we resisted at all.)
"Someone told him, "Your mother and brothers are standing outside, wanting to speak to you."
He [Jesus] replied to him, "Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?" Pointing to his disciples, he said, "Here are my mother and my brothers. For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother." -Matt 12:47-50
With those words, Jesus redefined "family." Family was no longer limited to blood, clan, cultural, or national ties. "Family" transcended dividing borders, and in Matthew 10, in highlighting the radically offensive nature of the Gospel, lists allegiance to earthly family as a possible hindrance to taking up our cross.
I love the story of the Rich Young Man. There is so much beef and umph in those verses. I love it (yet am secretly a little afraid) when Jesus says that it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of the needle than for a rich person to enter the Kingdom, and Mark says, "The disciples were even more amazed, and said to each other, 'Who then can be saved?'" In their minds, wealth indicated God's approval and blessing. I can see them in their amazement; John nudging Peter whispering, "Wait, did he just say that?" and Peter responding, "Dude, I'm not sure..." Without missing a beat, Jesus surprises us again and says, "With man this is impossible, but not with God; all things are possible with God." Yes, even a camel through the eye of the needle, says Jesus, is possible with God's grace.
Mark ends it by saying, "'I tell you the truth,' Jesus replied, 'no one who has left home or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or fields for me and the gospel will fail to receive a hundred times as much in this present age (homes, brothers, sisters, mothers, children and fields—and with them, persecutions) and in the age to come, eternal life. But many who are first will be last, and the last first.'"
In my selfishness, I wonder what it would look like to really treat others as family, to be truly generous, not just when I have a vested interest. I listened to my brother and his "me first" worldview today, dripping off of every sentence that came out of his mouth. (Granted, it was his birthday.) In my family in which the best has always been reserved for my brother and I, I wonder if I would be hearing a different way with words if we had lived a bigger vision of family.
Friday, May 25, 2007
Come and die, that you might live.
"Unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds." -John 12:24
So I am nearing the end of my walk through "Irresistible Revolution," though the real journey has just begun. I cannot, without counting the cost, follow in Shane Claiborne's footsteps. But I don't think he would call us all to follow his footsteps. He would call us to follow the Jesus he knows, who, without compromising, calls us to lay down our lives and pick up our crosses. If I concede that Shane's interpretations of certain parts of scripture are correct, then I too would be led to his conclusions. I think some of those conclusions warrant much further study, though we should be aware of our tendency to "prove" the status quo and explain away Truth. Every single issue he (scatterbrained-ly) brings up is worthy of our serious consideration as Christians. (If he spent more than a semester at Wheaton, I think he might have hung out with HNGR groupies :)
Whether or not one agrees with Shane's conclusions or manifestations of chasing after Jesus, I would whole-heartedly say that he is dead-on in his holy recklessness (in the eyes of the world) to live for Him. Read the book, if only for the reason of vicariously catching a glimpse of what it can mean to be alive (though there are plenty more).
The Lord will not all call us to live like Shane does (but don't let that be an excuse...). The Lord has called us to our own battles. The challenge is to recognize what the Lord calls us to, and to keep our grubby hands and crusty ideas from distorting it, and then to live it.
One thing I will echo John (and Shane) on... that we must die to live, and that this death just might look very different than what much of us are living right now....
I will not tiptoe my way towards death. Nor will I call the conventionally held measures of "life" and be content.
Love.
So I am nearing the end of my walk through "Irresistible Revolution," though the real journey has just begun. I cannot, without counting the cost, follow in Shane Claiborne's footsteps. But I don't think he would call us all to follow his footsteps. He would call us to follow the Jesus he knows, who, without compromising, calls us to lay down our lives and pick up our crosses. If I concede that Shane's interpretations of certain parts of scripture are correct, then I too would be led to his conclusions. I think some of those conclusions warrant much further study, though we should be aware of our tendency to "prove" the status quo and explain away Truth. Every single issue he (scatterbrained-ly) brings up is worthy of our serious consideration as Christians. (If he spent more than a semester at Wheaton, I think he might have hung out with HNGR groupies :)
Whether or not one agrees with Shane's conclusions or manifestations of chasing after Jesus, I would whole-heartedly say that he is dead-on in his holy recklessness (in the eyes of the world) to live for Him. Read the book, if only for the reason of vicariously catching a glimpse of what it can mean to be alive (though there are plenty more).
The Lord will not all call us to live like Shane does (but don't let that be an excuse...). The Lord has called us to our own battles. The challenge is to recognize what the Lord calls us to, and to keep our grubby hands and crusty ideas from distorting it, and then to live it.
One thing I will echo John (and Shane) on... that we must die to live, and that this death just might look very different than what much of us are living right now....
I will not tiptoe my way towards death. Nor will I call the conventionally held measures of "life" and be content.
Love.
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
"Eels are like women...
... if you try to hold them down, they'll just get away."
It's a quote from an obscure show called Samurai Champloo. I don't suppose too many of you have caught Eels before... I won't bore you with the details. But that idea is a manifestation of something that I'm learning, namely, living life with open hands.
Job says, "The Lord gives, and the Lord takes away. May the name of the Lord be praised." And later, when his wife tells him to curse God and die in his misery, he responds, " Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?"
Perhaps it was Richard Foster who first brought this notion of praying with open hands as a reminder to how we are to live our lives. If we live with open hands, we are free to receive from God and free to give others what we have received. We are also free to give up the things in our lives, even the good things, that threaten to tweak God's will with our plans little by little until it hardly looks like His calling for us any more. By then, what we are clasping tightly to our chest will be a dull watered down rationalized selfish version of something that used to be Christ-centered and glorious.
I'm selfish and I'm sentimental. Blame it on Adam, blame it on culture, blame it on me, the fact remains. But with open hands... when we are faithful, it frees us from having remorse over the things and people we missed out on and allows to live fully in what He has given. It helps us recognize that we, being very broken little people in the world, cannot possibly control all that happens to and around us, but that we can with faith, hold out our open hands receiving from God what He has ordained and letting go of ourselves in the process. It inevitably teaches us to let go of our miserly dreams and habits.
It allows us, in a world full of problems that overwhelm us and pain that threatens to numb us, to listen and obey what the Lord has called us to, where He has called us to it, in the timing He has called us to, and in the strength He supplies, no matter how small or how large of a task it might be.
There is freedom in that to finally breath deeply. I don't suppose something like that comes overnight. It's not so much a single act as it is a way of life.
Thank God for grace.
It's a quote from an obscure show called Samurai Champloo. I don't suppose too many of you have caught Eels before... I won't bore you with the details. But that idea is a manifestation of something that I'm learning, namely, living life with open hands.
Job says, "The Lord gives, and the Lord takes away. May the name of the Lord be praised." And later, when his wife tells him to curse God and die in his misery, he responds, " Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?"
Perhaps it was Richard Foster who first brought this notion of praying with open hands as a reminder to how we are to live our lives. If we live with open hands, we are free to receive from God and free to give others what we have received. We are also free to give up the things in our lives, even the good things, that threaten to tweak God's will with our plans little by little until it hardly looks like His calling for us any more. By then, what we are clasping tightly to our chest will be a dull watered down rationalized selfish version of something that used to be Christ-centered and glorious.
I'm selfish and I'm sentimental. Blame it on Adam, blame it on culture, blame it on me, the fact remains. But with open hands... when we are faithful, it frees us from having remorse over the things and people we missed out on and allows to live fully in what He has given. It helps us recognize that we, being very broken little people in the world, cannot possibly control all that happens to and around us, but that we can with faith, hold out our open hands receiving from God what He has ordained and letting go of ourselves in the process. It inevitably teaches us to let go of our miserly dreams and habits.
It allows us, in a world full of problems that overwhelm us and pain that threatens to numb us, to listen and obey what the Lord has called us to, where He has called us to it, in the timing He has called us to, and in the strength He supplies, no matter how small or how large of a task it might be.
There is freedom in that to finally breath deeply. I don't suppose something like that comes overnight. It's not so much a single act as it is a way of life.
Thank God for grace.
Monday, May 21, 2007
When I hear about the Spirit moving...
... I tear up.
I was sitting in the waiting area getting my overdue drivers license renewed, reading Shane Claiborne's Irresistible Revolution. Have you ever had to set down a book so that you could compose yourself before continuing onto the next paragraph? It doesn't happen often for me, but I was only in the third chapter when I had to do it, lest I start bawling at the NJ Department of Motor Vehicles waiting room. (Wouldn't be good for the license picture, ya know?)
Whether I agree with all his propositions or not is secondary. One cannot deny the punch in the gut that his words and experiences have. I'm not done with it, so I can't recommend it quite yet. But I have a feeling that I'll probably recommend it pretty soon.
I was sitting in the waiting area getting my overdue drivers license renewed, reading Shane Claiborne's Irresistible Revolution. Have you ever had to set down a book so that you could compose yourself before continuing onto the next paragraph? It doesn't happen often for me, but I was only in the third chapter when I had to do it, lest I start bawling at the NJ Department of Motor Vehicles waiting room. (Wouldn't be good for the license picture, ya know?)
Whether I agree with all his propositions or not is secondary. One cannot deny the punch in the gut that his words and experiences have. I'm not done with it, so I can't recommend it quite yet. But I have a feeling that I'll probably recommend it pretty soon.
Sunday, May 20, 2007
Saturday, May 19, 2007
"Christians, like slaves and soldiers, ask no questions."
Thanks Jerry Falwell, for that quote.
I spend too much time on Facebook.
I was recently invited to join the group, "Christians Standing with Israel." I wanted to post on the wall, without actually joining the group, since I certainly didn't agree with "unconditionally support" of Israel. However, I gave in just to make a post that gently stated the following:
- Christians should not just blindly support Israel based on religious ties and proof-texting.
- I challenged them to consider whether the secular nation-state of Israel is the same as the one mentioned in Scripture.
- I asked whether we should support Israel even when it goes against Biblical values like justice.
- Though I supported Israel's right to exist, I asked whether Israel had the "right" to oppress many of its own citizens who are even Christians, bringing to light the fact that there are such things as Arab Christians in the Middle East.
- I stated that if people had come to whatever conclusion they have through thoughtfulness, then I respected that, but challenged them to investigate more, mentioning Dr. Burge's book "Whose Land? Whose War? What Christians are not Being Told About Israel and the Palestinians."
Mind you, this was done in a non-threatening and gentle way. Just out of curiosity (and my Facebook addiction), I visited the group again today to see if there were any responses, but the moderators of the group felt it necessary to remove my post.
Granted, Christian Zionism bothers me, especially when if it blindly encourages the humanitarian abuse and injustice towards countless others, Christians and Muslims alike. However, when dialogue is stiffled so that a certain view or ideology might be presented without blemish or challenge, it makes me wonder if people value finding truth or if they just want to hear their own views supported with what they like to hear.
Of course, I already know the answer to that question... and I myself am not free of it. But for God's sake, Christians, at least *try* to fight it...
I spend too much time on Facebook.
I was recently invited to join the group, "Christians Standing with Israel." I wanted to post on the wall, without actually joining the group, since I certainly didn't agree with "unconditionally support" of Israel. However, I gave in just to make a post that gently stated the following:
- Christians should not just blindly support Israel based on religious ties and proof-texting.
- I challenged them to consider whether the secular nation-state of Israel is the same as the one mentioned in Scripture.
- I asked whether we should support Israel even when it goes against Biblical values like justice.
- Though I supported Israel's right to exist, I asked whether Israel had the "right" to oppress many of its own citizens who are even Christians, bringing to light the fact that there are such things as Arab Christians in the Middle East.
- I stated that if people had come to whatever conclusion they have through thoughtfulness, then I respected that, but challenged them to investigate more, mentioning Dr. Burge's book "Whose Land? Whose War? What Christians are not Being Told About Israel and the Palestinians."
Mind you, this was done in a non-threatening and gentle way. Just out of curiosity (and my Facebook addiction), I visited the group again today to see if there were any responses, but the moderators of the group felt it necessary to remove my post.
Granted, Christian Zionism bothers me, especially when if it blindly encourages the humanitarian abuse and injustice towards countless others, Christians and Muslims alike. However, when dialogue is stiffled so that a certain view or ideology might be presented without blemish or challenge, it makes me wonder if people value finding truth or if they just want to hear their own views supported with what they like to hear.
Of course, I already know the answer to that question... and I myself am not free of it. But for God's sake, Christians, at least *try* to fight it...
Friday, May 18, 2007
Golden cows play in the speakers of my mind
I think we all need something to worship.
I don't find it a coincidence that music and poetry is saturated with different variations on the theme of love (or lack thereof, or the disappoints, hurt, etc.) It takes the means we have of deeper expression and combines it with the thing we are trying to worship, elevating it (whether or not it deserves to be elevated).
We all need something to worship, to give ourselves to, to depend on and take joy in. To love.
The difficulty for some of us is learning to worship the right thing, or rather, right Person. The difficulty lies in worshipping the right Person when other things and people are right in front of us... when the deep expressions of music, art and poetry encourage us to be idolaters and crown something or someone else lord.
We all need to worship. I desperately want to worship. The question is what, or who, am I worshipping?
I don't find it a coincidence that music and poetry is saturated with different variations on the theme of love (or lack thereof, or the disappoints, hurt, etc.) It takes the means we have of deeper expression and combines it with the thing we are trying to worship, elevating it (whether or not it deserves to be elevated).
We all need something to worship, to give ourselves to, to depend on and take joy in. To love.
The difficulty for some of us is learning to worship the right thing, or rather, right Person. The difficulty lies in worshipping the right Person when other things and people are right in front of us... when the deep expressions of music, art and poetry encourage us to be idolaters and crown something or someone else lord.
We all need to worship. I desperately want to worship. The question is what, or who, am I worshipping?
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
Falwell, it was about time.
Rest in peace, Jerry Falwell. I pray the Lord welcomes you into His presence. You were bit of a mixed bag (to be generous...). He shows much grace...
But we here on earth are VERY glad for your passing.
Sorry Liberty, but that man was doing some hefty damage. I pray the school follows a slightly different path....
(Is it bad that I am extraordinarily relieved, thankful, and happy that he's gone?? I'll try to rein it in a little. But please allow me to celebrate just a bit.)
But we here on earth are VERY glad for your passing.
Sorry Liberty, but that man was doing some hefty damage. I pray the school follows a slightly different path....
(Is it bad that I am extraordinarily relieved, thankful, and happy that he's gone?? I'll try to rein it in a little. But please allow me to celebrate just a bit.)
Monday, May 14, 2007
What am I, tech support??
Well, I thought I would make a departure from the normal fare to present you with.... [insert trumpet fanfare here]... how to make Bootcamp work with a newly installed hard drive on your 13" Macbook using SuperDuper as backup!
(Woah there, don't get too excited. But this is for posterity's sake... so Google search, snatch this sucker up for all those other poor folks like me who got stumped, so that they won't have to go through the same thing I did.)
Best way to install a new hard drive on the Macbook:
1. Buy new HD. (I got a 160gig Seagate drive to replace the 80gig Seagate drive that came stock with the Macbook). Sorry Apple, your upgrades are too expensive.
2. Get an external enclosure to house the drive, which can also be used for the drive that's been swapped out as a handy dandy external. I personally got this one. Looks nice, sturdy, and has worked well, at least so far. It's a USB2, but it does the job.
3. Get SuperDuper. It's an amazing free Backup program for Macs. It makes a bootable clone of your drive, and neatly copies it onto the new drive, which means all you will have to do is physically swap the drive and start up the computer! No clean reinstalls, no bugging your friends for programs you no longer have, no lamenting over the forgotten folder that you deleted.
Most of that info can be found online, since that's standard for swapping hard drives.
However, I could find precious little about how to get the new Bootcamp Beta 1.2 to work with SuperDuper. I figured I would remove the original partition on the old drive, make a clone on the new drive, plug the new drive in, update to Bootcamp 1.2 (with wonderful new drivers for the iSight, touchpad, remote, and soundcard!), and then reinstall Windows XP. But nope. After talking with a very nice gentlemen at the company who makes SuperDuper, he gave me the breakthrough:
Key thing they don't tell you: Not only do you have to format the new hard drive as Mac OS Extended (Journaled), but you have to go under "Partition" and set it as a GUID, or else Bootcamp will not work!!
But after I did that, everything should be dandy. Swap the new drive, open Bootcamp, and Windows XP away on your new larger hard drive :). It's installing for me as we speak.
My baby is now the epitome of perfection and all things beautiful.
Is it disturbing that I got a kick out of writing that? For all you Mac fanboys who still need to boot in windows, I hope that was helpful.
We will now return to you our regularly scheduled narcissism.
(Woah there, don't get too excited. But this is for posterity's sake... so Google search, snatch this sucker up for all those other poor folks like me who got stumped, so that they won't have to go through the same thing I did.)
Best way to install a new hard drive on the Macbook:
1. Buy new HD. (I got a 160gig Seagate drive to replace the 80gig Seagate drive that came stock with the Macbook). Sorry Apple, your upgrades are too expensive.
2. Get an external enclosure to house the drive, which can also be used for the drive that's been swapped out as a handy dandy external. I personally got this one. Looks nice, sturdy, and has worked well, at least so far. It's a USB2, but it does the job.
3. Get SuperDuper. It's an amazing free Backup program for Macs. It makes a bootable clone of your drive, and neatly copies it onto the new drive, which means all you will have to do is physically swap the drive and start up the computer! No clean reinstalls, no bugging your friends for programs you no longer have, no lamenting over the forgotten folder that you deleted.
Most of that info can be found online, since that's standard for swapping hard drives.
However, I could find precious little about how to get the new Bootcamp Beta 1.2 to work with SuperDuper. I figured I would remove the original partition on the old drive, make a clone on the new drive, plug the new drive in, update to Bootcamp 1.2 (with wonderful new drivers for the iSight, touchpad, remote, and soundcard!), and then reinstall Windows XP. But nope. After talking with a very nice gentlemen at the company who makes SuperDuper, he gave me the breakthrough:
Key thing they don't tell you: Not only do you have to format the new hard drive as Mac OS Extended (Journaled), but you have to go under "Partition" and set it as a GUID, or else Bootcamp will not work!!
But after I did that, everything should be dandy. Swap the new drive, open Bootcamp, and Windows XP away on your new larger hard drive :). It's installing for me as we speak.
My baby is now the epitome of perfection and all things beautiful.
Is it disturbing that I got a kick out of writing that? For all you Mac fanboys who still need to boot in windows, I hope that was helpful.
We will now return to you our regularly scheduled narcissism.
Sunday, May 13, 2007
Lots of "craps", but not so many giggles. (A treatise, and a thought.)
A treatise:
Given the general Evangelical cultural norms, I feel like I need to justify my use of "profanity" to my brothers and sisters who do not necessarily feel the same way I do. It's a multi-faceted argument, one that I don't want to spend a lot of time on, but will throw out there so that you might have at least a general sense of where I stand on this, and not think that I've gone apostate for imbibing in an Evangelical taboo.
- First is the emphasis on loving our neighbors. Anything, whether it is labeled as a curse word or not, if said in anger, is out of the question. If you like labels, I'm advocating for the label, "spirit of the law."
- Second, words are contextual. They are fluid. Different contexts grant different meanings to words. They same four letters are not the same across different spheres or circles. There is a complicated interaction where the word itself has a historical meaning, then has a cultural context, then an intended use, as well as a perceived meaning by the receiving parties. Care needs to be taken especially with the perceived meaning, given Paul's pleading for us not to cause anyone to stumble in Romans 14, hence the explanations of my actions. However, not causing anyone to stumble needs to be balanced with simple mindless appeasement.
- What's the difference between Christian curses such as "frick, shoot, darn" and normal curses? They are used the same way, often in the same context.
- I am fully aware and agree with "let no unwholesome thing come out of your mouth" and our words and actions being the overflow of our hearts, as well as blessing other people with our words. However, this is not to say we should muffle an expression of frustration, especially when darn or shoot just doesn't encapsulate the depth of our emotion. Which leads me to the next point...
- Cursing, if used, should be used sparingly and intentionally. If used loosely, it loses its ability to emphasize and highlight. Therefore, when used in the proper context for the sake of emphasis, I find the carte blanche prohibition against cursing, among other things, to be quite simplistic.
- Paul curses. In Philippians 3:8, when he talks about considering all things to be "rubbish" for the sake of knowing Christ, it is a consensus among Biblical and Greek scholars that the term "skubalon," which we translate to be "rubbish," is actually more accurately translated as "human excrement" with the same offensive connotations to that audience that we would attribute to the word "shit" today.
Given all of the above, this does not mean I always flawlessly abide by what I believe. But it does mean that I do not say what I do carelessly and without thought. I am not looking for vindication from my brothers and sisters, since it is the Lord who I am trying to please. But I am not unaware of the issue... which honestly, given the severity of many other things, (oh I don't know, like love, justice, redemption, peace, etc), I don't think is quite as big as a deal as some make it to be. I could quote Campolo here, but I won't push my luck.
Don't think that I don't love Jesus just because I have made a conscious decision to season my life with selective colorful language :). And for the sake of respect, for those to whom it is offensive, I will censor myself.
I'll get off my soapbox now.
A thought:
We are so fragile. In our youth, when our bodies are well, we hardly give them a second thought, putting our vessels through abuse thinking that we are invincible. But something so tiny as a microscopic virus can put us through a very keen awareness of our fragility as humans. It reminds us that we are neither impervious nor superhuman, and that our bodies are so tied with who we are and our wellbeing. It humbles us to recognize that our being is in Christ, and that we are so dependent on He who holds us together. As I was reminded during stressful finals week, and as I was reminded by yesterday's Mexican food, lots of shits do not make for lots of giggles.
My HNGR friends, third world amoebas and parasites are going to add a very realistic and important dynamic to our internships.
The Lord will be our strength in ways we've never experienced before... quite holistically, if you catch my floater. I mean drift.
Hellllooooo Pepto.
Given the general Evangelical cultural norms, I feel like I need to justify my use of "profanity" to my brothers and sisters who do not necessarily feel the same way I do. It's a multi-faceted argument, one that I don't want to spend a lot of time on, but will throw out there so that you might have at least a general sense of where I stand on this, and not think that I've gone apostate for imbibing in an Evangelical taboo.
- First is the emphasis on loving our neighbors. Anything, whether it is labeled as a curse word or not, if said in anger, is out of the question. If you like labels, I'm advocating for the label, "spirit of the law."
- Second, words are contextual. They are fluid. Different contexts grant different meanings to words. They same four letters are not the same across different spheres or circles. There is a complicated interaction where the word itself has a historical meaning, then has a cultural context, then an intended use, as well as a perceived meaning by the receiving parties. Care needs to be taken especially with the perceived meaning, given Paul's pleading for us not to cause anyone to stumble in Romans 14, hence the explanations of my actions. However, not causing anyone to stumble needs to be balanced with simple mindless appeasement.
- What's the difference between Christian curses such as "frick, shoot, darn" and normal curses? They are used the same way, often in the same context.
- I am fully aware and agree with "let no unwholesome thing come out of your mouth" and our words and actions being the overflow of our hearts, as well as blessing other people with our words. However, this is not to say we should muffle an expression of frustration, especially when darn or shoot just doesn't encapsulate the depth of our emotion. Which leads me to the next point...
- Cursing, if used, should be used sparingly and intentionally. If used loosely, it loses its ability to emphasize and highlight. Therefore, when used in the proper context for the sake of emphasis, I find the carte blanche prohibition against cursing, among other things, to be quite simplistic.
- Paul curses. In Philippians 3:8, when he talks about considering all things to be "rubbish" for the sake of knowing Christ, it is a consensus among Biblical and Greek scholars that the term "skubalon," which we translate to be "rubbish," is actually more accurately translated as "human excrement" with the same offensive connotations to that audience that we would attribute to the word "shit" today.
Given all of the above, this does not mean I always flawlessly abide by what I believe. But it does mean that I do not say what I do carelessly and without thought. I am not looking for vindication from my brothers and sisters, since it is the Lord who I am trying to please. But I am not unaware of the issue... which honestly, given the severity of many other things, (oh I don't know, like love, justice, redemption, peace, etc), I don't think is quite as big as a deal as some make it to be. I could quote Campolo here, but I won't push my luck.
Don't think that I don't love Jesus just because I have made a conscious decision to season my life with selective colorful language :). And for the sake of respect, for those to whom it is offensive, I will censor myself.
I'll get off my soapbox now.
A thought:
We are so fragile. In our youth, when our bodies are well, we hardly give them a second thought, putting our vessels through abuse thinking that we are invincible. But something so tiny as a microscopic virus can put us through a very keen awareness of our fragility as humans. It reminds us that we are neither impervious nor superhuman, and that our bodies are so tied with who we are and our wellbeing. It humbles us to recognize that our being is in Christ, and that we are so dependent on He who holds us together. As I was reminded during stressful finals week, and as I was reminded by yesterday's Mexican food, lots of shits do not make for lots of giggles.
My HNGR friends, third world amoebas and parasites are going to add a very realistic and important dynamic to our internships.
The Lord will be our strength in ways we've never experienced before... quite holistically, if you catch my floater. I mean drift.
Hellllooooo Pepto.
Thursday, May 10, 2007
His grace is surely sufficient.
Wholly unmerited, fully undeserved grace puts me on my face. To know that the goodness, provision, and undying love of God remains constant despite my flagrant rebellion and disrespect towards the One who grants it to me... who am I to receive such an otherworldly thing?
Fear produces change for as long as the threat seems eminent. Love changes people by creating a gratitude that responds in far deeper and more intrinsic ways.
Fear produces change for as long as the threat seems eminent. Love changes people by creating a gratitude that responds in far deeper and more intrinsic ways.
Wednesday, May 9, 2007
I have come so that you might have life, life to the full...
A taste of being alive.
Alive. I recognize it when I see it. But the last place I felt it, if only a little bit, was away from civilization... away from all the ghosts that come with being with people... in the Everglades of Florida.
Being alive cannot ultimately be about place. It can't be about having the money to "get away." It can't be something that only privileged or educated people have access to.
It certainly cannot mean being free from stress, difficulty, or hurt, because that is the bulk of what life is for most people on this planet. No, being alive, whatever that means, must exist in the presence of the pain. It has to thrive in the midst of this fallen existence.
I know what it is not. I have lived, and continue to live lacking it. I can paint a detailed portrait of everything that makes me feel like a valley of dry bones, of barely hanging on, struggling to breath. But what it is...
Well, whatever it is, it is so attractive when I see it. I can point to the people who have it, at least sometimes. And though it evades my ability to pin it with words, it teases me with its existence and beauty.
It has something to do with God, and joy, and people. Oh, and love. Love; that which confuses, awes, and humbles me; an adjective used to complete the designation of "I AM"; that which I distort, hope in, and am hurt by.
Those have something to do with being alive, though not in the ways I have thus understood it.
Something needs to change, because all is not right with this world.
Alive. I recognize it when I see it. But the last place I felt it, if only a little bit, was away from civilization... away from all the ghosts that come with being with people... in the Everglades of Florida.
Being alive cannot ultimately be about place. It can't be about having the money to "get away." It can't be something that only privileged or educated people have access to.
It certainly cannot mean being free from stress, difficulty, or hurt, because that is the bulk of what life is for most people on this planet. No, being alive, whatever that means, must exist in the presence of the pain. It has to thrive in the midst of this fallen existence.
I know what it is not. I have lived, and continue to live lacking it. I can paint a detailed portrait of everything that makes me feel like a valley of dry bones, of barely hanging on, struggling to breath. But what it is...
Well, whatever it is, it is so attractive when I see it. I can point to the people who have it, at least sometimes. And though it evades my ability to pin it with words, it teases me with its existence and beauty.
It has something to do with God, and joy, and people. Oh, and love. Love; that which confuses, awes, and humbles me; an adjective used to complete the designation of "I AM"; that which I distort, hope in, and am hurt by.
Those have something to do with being alive, though not in the ways I have thus understood it.
Something needs to change, because all is not right with this world.
Monday, May 7, 2007
Three Stripes on a Puffy Sleave Means You're Better.
I don't mind driving from Wheaton to Jersey. It gives me lots of time to think.
I was listening to some Talib Kweli when in the middle of his song "I Try," Mary J. Blige sings about the upside down Kingdom. For some reason, those words contrasted so sharply with what I feel like Wheaton can be about sometimes. Achievement, success, degrees and graduate schools, well-dressed banquets, smiles, formalities, and hors d'hoeurvs with movers and shakers... they have their place in this world and culture. They have their purposes and necessities, but they have left me feeling grimy. I bit the hook, got snagged on things like admiring the Prof's gowns and wondering how mine will look, and now I feel like I have to scrape a layer of dirt off myself.
An upside down Kingdom, one that consists of the poor in spirit, mourners, the meek, the merciful, the pure in heart, the peacemakers and the persecuted. If that indeed is what the Kingdom will look like, why do I feel so far removed from the Kingdom, as if it were only something I could reach through books and biographies? Why do I feel my calling cede ground to comfort, status, and my own interpretation of it?
"Listen my dear brothers: Has not God chosen those who are poor in the eyes of the world to be rich in faith and to inherit the kingdom he promised those who love him?" -James 2:5
What does it take for all my misdirected energy, tears, and efforts to be pointed back to my first love and His kingdom?
I was listening to some Talib Kweli when in the middle of his song "I Try," Mary J. Blige sings about the upside down Kingdom. For some reason, those words contrasted so sharply with what I feel like Wheaton can be about sometimes. Achievement, success, degrees and graduate schools, well-dressed banquets, smiles, formalities, and hors d'hoeurvs with movers and shakers... they have their place in this world and culture. They have their purposes and necessities, but they have left me feeling grimy. I bit the hook, got snagged on things like admiring the Prof's gowns and wondering how mine will look, and now I feel like I have to scrape a layer of dirt off myself.
An upside down Kingdom, one that consists of the poor in spirit, mourners, the meek, the merciful, the pure in heart, the peacemakers and the persecuted. If that indeed is what the Kingdom will look like, why do I feel so far removed from the Kingdom, as if it were only something I could reach through books and biographies? Why do I feel my calling cede ground to comfort, status, and my own interpretation of it?
"Listen my dear brothers: Has not God chosen those who are poor in the eyes of the world to be rich in faith and to inherit the kingdom he promised those who love him?" -James 2:5
What does it take for all my misdirected energy, tears, and efforts to be pointed back to my first love and His kingdom?
Sunday, May 6, 2007
Until Next Time...
Many of my friends walked today. And others I will not see for the next 7 months, for better or for worse.
So it goes, so it goes.
Blessings, friends. May the Lord bless you and keep you... God knows you'll need it.
Ciao.
So it goes, so it goes.
Blessings, friends. May the Lord bless you and keep you... God knows you'll need it.
Ciao.
Wednesday, May 2, 2007
He makes all things new.
What makes yesterday different from today? Aren't all beginnings and ends more or less artificial? What makes us really think that things will be different tomorrow?
But here I am, trying to capitalize on these artificial ends and beginnings. The end of the year has arrived. Tianjin, China is a stone's throw away. This year needs to be quarantined and marginalized to the pages of my journal.
New blog. Fresh pages. Don't repeat the same mistakes.
Never forget the lessons learned, but sometimes we need to take what we can get to move on.
Hello, Blogger.
But here I am, trying to capitalize on these artificial ends and beginnings. The end of the year has arrived. Tianjin, China is a stone's throw away. This year needs to be quarantined and marginalized to the pages of my journal.
New blog. Fresh pages. Don't repeat the same mistakes.
Never forget the lessons learned, but sometimes we need to take what we can get to move on.
Hello, Blogger.
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